


The aftermath of something lethal (an echo of inflicted evil)

by Amanita_Cynth



Series: AroWriMo 2020 [2]
Category: Original Work
Genre: Aromantic, Asexual Character, Character Study, Gen, Gun violence mentioned, Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Nonbinary Character, Other, Queerplatonic Relationships, Relationship Study, and hospital scenes if thats an issue, arowrimo, i swear this isnt quite as dreary as im making it seem, pretty frank discussion of murder and violence in general, thats all i can write apparently, the mature tag is for, theres also some vomiting mentioned if thats a real problem for you
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-08
Updated: 2020-02-09
Packaged: 2021-02-19 04:54:39
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 10
Words: 9,931
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22605445
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Amanita_Cynth/pseuds/Amanita_Cynth
Summary: The Champions are made up of runaways and soldiers and victims- and Saffron, who manages to fit all of those moulds. But she has a new family, and Bayley, for one, isn't going to let her drown in quiet self-loathing. And they might just learn something about their own self-esteem along the way.
Series: AroWriMo 2020 [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1624459
Kudos: 1





	1. Allen 1

**Author's Note:**

> Title is from Amrita C AKA sunrisesong on tumblr.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Because this is based on a plot that you aren't always seeing I'll leave context (and sometimes names so you know who is who) in the beginning notes. For example, for this chapter: 
> 
> tfw you were chosen without your input to be the champion of a pantheon of animal-based gods of 'the unwanted, the crushed, the abandoned and the lost, the outcasts and strangers in their own skin' and you were actually having quite a lot of fun but now theres more and youre an organisation now?? and youre basically co-responsible for them and some of the new ones are turning out to be alarming even by champion standards???

**T Minus 894 Days**

“Hey, Raven!” He turned at the carefully cheerful call to see Heron perched on a railing, waving at him. “Got something for you.” 

“Oh?” He raised an eyebrow, staying still. Even amongst the ones they had so far, Heron was flighty and reflexive. “What is it, pretty?” 

“Got a version of your mask here with night vision.” She said, shifting on her perch before holding out a pouch on a long chain. It swayed slightly in the wind, ever-present when up so high. “Since you patrol at night so much still. It should be adjusted to work with bird eyes but tell me if it needs any tweaking. Yeah...” 

As she trailed off he stepped closer and took the bag, opening it to find a more mechanised looking mask without the beak but a clear space to add one. 

“You made this?” He asked, voice full of wonder. 

“Yes.” She relaxed slightly, though she was still watching him closely. “Electronics...I like making and programming them. It’s a challenge. I’m, uh, working on comms for us right now. Hard to figure out a network to use that doesn’t leave us open to hacking.”

“An electronic network I could probably shield alright.” He perked up. 

“Problem is I’d have to drop some physical boosters around the city. There’s a limit to the range I can push from them.” She’d relaxed further, tapping her fingers against her knee as she thought. “And anything physical...” 

“Is an easy access point. And they’d probably be trackable.” He nodded, humming as he put the night vision mask back in the pouch and slung it over his shoulder. The chain chafed a little against the joint of his wing but he ignored it. “So they’d have to be in rather inaccessible areas to anyone else, but we’d still have to keep an eye on it. Hmm. We might be able to create proximity sensors?” 

“But they might draw attention that the smaller boosters wouldn’t, perhaps cancelling out the benefit of having them. Especially considering the height the boosters would ideally be at.” She countered. 

“Good point.” He nodded. 

“You could disguise- woah!” A new voice thoughtfully joined in only to be cut off as Heron instantly lunged in that direction. The person just managed to avoid the strike as Heron suddenly yelped and tried to pull the kick. 

He took a moment to remember their name- Slink-Mink, that was it. 

“Don’t surprise me like that!” Heron was yelling. “I wouldn’t think I’d have to tell you that again!”

“Me neither.” Slink-Mink said dryly, thumbing gently at the scab on their lip. “Sorry, it was an accident. I thought you knew I was there.” 

“I didn’t.” she said, abruptly looking horrified and sounding terrified. “How did you manage that? No.” And all of it was gone. She looked rather blank instead. “I know. I was too distracted.” 

“Heron, it’s fine. Nothing would have happened.” Allen said carefully. “We’re too high up for anyone else to sneak up on us.” 

She just looked at him before bowing her head respectfully. 

“I’m glad you appreciate the night mask. Let’s communicate later about the comms.” 

“Heron, wait.” Slink-Mink said. “ _Saff_.” 

But it was no use- Heron was already spreading her wings and throwing herself into the air. She vanished within seconds. 

“ _Shit_.” Slink-Mink said, quiet but with a lot of fervour. Then they glanced at him and blushed. “Sorry.” 

“No, it’s fine, I understand.” He waved it away. Hesitated. Asked, “Do you...know what happened to her?” 

It was obvious something had. She didn’t look any older than him, and most people in their early twenties didn’t respond to realising there was someone secretly around by throwing themselves at them in an attack. He’d also caught the fact that Slink-Mink seemed to know her name when no-one else did. 

The answer was clear just by the way their shoulders slumped. 

“No.” They admitted. “I don’t know. I don’t think I _want_ to know.” They glanced in the direction Heron had headed. “I’d better head after her.” 

“Alright. Good luck.” He said, because they’d definitely need it. And Heron didn’t seem the type to appreciate someone tracking her down- but that maybe wasn’t the point. It wasn’t so much about what Heron wanted as what she _needed_. 

He made a mental note to talk to Cat about what else Heron might need. 


	2. Rich 1

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> tfw those local heroes suddenly have a lot of members, get creepily possessed, pass out and sleep for like three days before waking up and getting a little rowdy but you cant in good conscience let them leave

**T Minus 851 Days**

“Alright, alright!” Cat yelled, raising her hands in the air. “Will you stay still for five seconds so I can count you?!” They didn’t exactly freeze, but they stopped crowding her and yelling, which she seemed happy enough about. She had to have some sort of system he didn’t understand because within 10 seconds she let out a groan and went, “Where the fuck is Heron?” 

“Um. She snuck off.” A smaller, dark-skinned and dark-clothed one piped up. Rich had never seen them- her?- before. 

“Oh my god, of course she did. Can you track her?”

“Can I track her?” They repeated disdainfully. “I could track that girl through anything, I bet. Smells like iron all the time.” 

“Let me rephrase, Mink.” Cat said impatiently. “ _Find her._ ” 

“Yessir.” Mink said, taking a second to taste the air before trotting off down a hallway. 

They reappeared a few minutes later, walking behind a grumbling, short woman that he recognised immediately as Heron because the champion spotters had been quite taken with her costume and white-haired, long pigtails. She was immediately swarmed, though he noticed that none of them actually got too close or touched her. Regardless of that care, she tensed up a little. 

“Let me through!” Someone barked with surprising authority when he saw who it was that was pushing their way forward. It was one of the champions that had been quieter earlier, a petite looking girl in a monochrome outfit that seemed inspired by classical magical girls (which he, of course, only knew about because of his niece, okay?). “What the hell did you think you were doing, running off without letting me get a look at you!” She growled. Rich caught a shiver of very large teeth before she visibly tamped again on it again. 

It didn’t stop some of the others from shifting further away from her, so he figured she was one of the newer ones with less control. 

Heron, meanwhile, was giving her a mildly baffled expression. 

“We were given medical attention.” She pointed out. 

“Like I’d not wanna check that over!” The other girl snapped back. He’d really need to find out some names, and soon. “I double-checked all the flyers extra careful cos of the potential falls. Especially with your- oh lord, did they give you anything? Did the doctors give her anything?” Her attention swung sharply to him, which was more intimidating than it should have been. 

“She didn’t have any major wounds, so probably not?” He answered uncertainly. 

“Shark, it’s fine.” Heron sighed, still looking confused but a little annoyed as well. “You know I have self-donated blood in cold storage around the city, and I’m used to minimal medical treatment and no painkillers. I’ve literally survived things that would fell you twice over, I just _really_ wanted to look at the gadgets and I was barely hurting.” 

“I’ve got a lot of problems,” Beetle said before anyone else could speak, “But you definitely have me beat. Do you need to be so intense all the time?” 

“Yes.” She deadpanned. “I don’t like doctors. Sorry, Shark.” 

“No offence taken.” She said, though she was still glaring. “Let someone _know_ next time.” 

“Acceptable.” She shrugged. Then she looked at him, gaze sweeping up and down him. “Richard Stein.” She noted almost casually. 

“Hello.” He said, unnerved despite himself. 

“Are we in the UDL tower?” She asked the others, dismissing him completely. It was a very strange situation for him and all he could do was gape. 

“Yeah.” The person who’d tracked her down- Mink, wasn’t it?- said, giving him an apologetic smile even as Heron was carefully folded into their ranks and out of sight as people began explaining things to her. 

They did a pretty good job keeping her and some of the others squirrelled away, too. None of them were happy about being kept inside the tower and he mostly interacted with Phoenix, Cat and Eagle, the others staying far away from any UDL member. Whenever he did see her in the company of other champions, she was standing at the edges, quietly watching them interact.

It was a bit of a shock, then, when he went into his personal lab eight days later to see her standing by one of his tables. 

“What the hell, Heron?!” He yelped. 

“Hello, Richard.” She greeted absently, still peering closely at what was on the workstation. “I was working on a prototype for Snowy, a prototype of a prototype really, to help her get her voice back in a way and I saw something in here the other day that I thought would help me. Basically, there’s a tool that some people with damaged vocal cords use to create an artificial vibration so they can talk, but it sounds pretty flat and robotic and the devices can be kinda clunky. I’m aiming to make one that can mimic tone. They work via vibration so I’m thinking that eventually I can work it into a sort of collar that works off of subvocalizations but I had to prod into biology a bit and I’m not that good at it yet.” 

He just stared agape at the sudden rush of the words from somebody usually so reticent. All he could think to say was,

“Like the dogs from Up?”

She paused and turned to look at him. 

“What?” 

“A collar, like the dogs from Up?”

“What is ‘Up’?” She asked suspiciously, eyes narrowing as he let out a snort at the accidental saying. 

“It’s, you know, it’s this animated film for kids, saddest opening scene ever, everybody cries at it. It’s about a house that flies because of balloons attached to it and there are talking dogs, I think you’d remember it if you saw it.” 

“A house cannot fly because of balloons.” 

“Actually, they did the math- hang on, we’re getting off track.”

“It’s pointless, I haven’t really seen any films or TV shows.” She said. “The others...threw a fit, you could say. There is a Disney marathon planned. I’m aware enough of Disney films to know that I will probably hate it.” 

He stared. It seemed that every time he heard her speak he got more concerned about her. Beetle’s comments about her intensity were making a lot of sense now, especially in contrast to her easy ramblings over her engineering experiments. 

“You know, there are all 21 champions here, you could get started on that now.” He tried. 

“22.” She blinked slowly. 

“What?” 

“There are 22 champions.” She corrected, a slow smile spreading across her face. “And right now I’m the only one in the tower.”

“ _What_?” 

She hummed to herself, picking carefully at the in-progress project in front of her, as he scurried over to the terminal and tried to verify what she’d said. The tower AI was insisting that they were all _exactly_ where they’d been sitting when Rich left, which was evidence enough that something was wrong. 

“Heron, what did they do?” He demanded. 

“I think they were planning to hack your AI then get Chameo to open a window from outside.” She shrugged. “Once they determined me as the distraction I stopped listening as it put me at high risk of capture, so the less I knew the better.” 

“They went out the window?!” He spluttered. “They were on the _tenth fucking floor_.” 

She just smiled at him again and he swore and rushed out of the room. It was no use; there was no sign of any of the champions, and there was indeed a large section of the window that had been opened. By the time he realised that leaving Heron alone wasn’t the best idea, she’d already vanished like smoke on the wind, though kindly enough she didn’t take any of his things with her.


	3. Maricel and Rotti

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> tfw youre young adult vigilantes getting reminded of what a mess your lives actually are but at least saffron seems to be acting more her age for once

**T Minus 737 Days**

A phone ringing wasn’t exactly a normal occasion for champions on patrol, even if technically speaking Maricel and Rotti had finished ten minutes ago and were just hanging out in uniform. 

“Don’t look at me.” She said when each of them looked to the other. “Does it look like I have pockets?” 

Grumbling, he searched until he found his phone, blinking at the name on the screen before answering on speaker. 

“Y’ello?” 

“I missed my last shopping trip cos of the riot.” Cain said bluntly. “There’s some things we need. I know you two have finished patrol so could you pick them up for me and I’ll pay you back.” 

“Well hello to you too.” Rotti sniffed. 

“Yes. Hello. I’ll text you a list.” 

They shared glances. 

“Neither of us know how to grocery shop.” Maricel pointed out. 

“Learn.” He said flatly, and hung up. 

So that was how they found themselves standing in front of a supermarket and staring warily at the brightly lit interior. They’d attracted a fair audience, though nobody got close to them. Friendly Rattler and Rottweiler might be, but intimidating was _also_ an accurate word to use. 

“Do we need a list or something?” She asked. 

“Yeah, Beetle sent us one.” 

“...Do you know where anything is?”

“No.” 

There was another long pause. 

“I’ve literally never been more aware of how fucked up we are.” She commented.

“Well, at least we can be fucked up together.” He returned. “C’mon.”

By silent mutual agreement Maricel took the cart. One of the wheels wobbled and it was trickier than she’d thought to keep it in a straight line, but it was better than Rotti accidentally breaking the thing if his strength got out of hand again. 

It was a bit like stepping into another universe where the lights never changed and people existed in their own worlds, completely unaware of each other. The apocalypse could probably happen and the inside would remain unchanged, the shoppers drifting through the aisles like ghosts as the same tinny tune played forever. Rotti got a little mental whiplash from the sudden atmosphere change.

They shared glances again before moving.

In the end it took them an hour to find everything, which was probably far longer than it should have. They’d also somehow managed to break the self-focused stupor because they’d found themselves with a group of whispering teenagers following them from a ways back. They were going to have to find a way to get the bags of groceries back while also losing their impromptu fanclub meeting.

Once they actually got to the cashier they found themselves with another problem. 

“Do you have any cash on you?” Maricel suddenly asked as the clerk started nervously scanning and bagging. 

“Uh.” He looked down at the piles of groceries. “Not enough to pay for all that.”

“Well I can’t exactly use my card to pay for champion groceries. Would it be ethically wrong to use cash we, uh, _liberated_ to pay for these?”

“Probably?” Rotti said, voice edged with doubt. 

“Do you take jewellery?” Maricel asked the cashier. They’d picked some up from a gang of thieves and hadn’t been able to figure out the origins of it all so she still had some on hand.

“...no?” Her eyes darted between them as she paused for a moment, looking more flustered by the second. 

“Hmm. We’re pretty near Heron’s patrol route. Think she’ll bring some cash if we ask?” She continued. 

“Worth a shot.”

She picked up after the second ring, sounding alert but not too alarmed. Any true emergencies would have come down the comms, not phones.

“What is it?” 

“Hey, dogboy and I are at the supermarket on 5th and West. Can you bring cash? Least 40.” 

There was a pause. 

“You’re shopping in uniform?” _You idiots_ , went unsaid. 

“Yep.” 

The line fell dead without her responding, but the cashier was on the last few items when a voice suddenly came from behind the softly bickering twosome.

“Can I buy this?” 

“Gah- _jesus_ , woman, make some noise for once!” Rotti spluttered. 

“That is counter-intuitive to my goals.” 

“Sometimes I manage to forget that you were a child soldier, and then you do something like this.” How she managed to stay so quiet in combat boots on a plastic floor without even trying was truly a mystery for the ages.

She just stared at the two of them before leaning past them and dropping the sweets she’d been holding in front of the wide-eyed cashier followed by a bundle of cash. 

Once they’d left the teenagers were still following them and Saffron was somehow carrying all of the bags while also holding her sweets and unwrapping one with what Rotti _knew_ had to be some of her assassin-ninja-whatever skills. Either way she seemed in a pretty good mood, or what passed for it from her.

“Before you run, can I ask what your deal is with those sweets?” He asked. 

She paused, hard-boiled sweet in front of her mouth, for the tiniest of seconds before popping it in and speaking, voice carefully devoid of emotion. 

“My brother’s girlfriend used to give them to me when she was worried about me.” 

He blinked as Maricel made a mildly intrigued noise. That hadn’t been what he expected at all. 

“So it’s just good old nostalgia, huh?” He asked with what, for him, was a soft smile. Anyone else would probably see it as a smirk, but she could read him well. She was trained to. 

“I suppose.” She said, shifting her weight a little. “Anyway, I’d better get these groceries back so you guys actually have a trifling chance at losing your tails.” 

“Rude!” Maricel protested, but she was already unfurling her wings and taking off. “Dogboy, I think she just made a _joke_.” 

“Maybe we have been good for her after all.”

“Good for her sense of humour at least.” 


	4. Bayley 1

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> tfw your rich superhero benefactors gets you tickets to a highend fashion show and you very obviously dont belong

**T Minus 650 Days**

Saffron was staring at one model in particular. Bayley shifted, feeling a little uncomfortable at the sight of her intense focus, her slightly wide eyes. 

“What is it?” They asked. 

“How do women wear high heels?” Saffron immediately asked, which wasn’t quite what they expected. “They seem very difficult to balance on. Then again, I think they’d make great weapons. Her’s are at least three inches. They could probably take out someone’s eye-” 

“Oh dear god.” Bayley muttered, and shuffled the two of them further away from the other patrons, some of whom had been starting to look pretty concerned. “Listen, I know saying that sort of thing is just who you are and we’re always so happy when you can act like yourself around us, but maybe also consider other people that may be around? Also, I don’t need the image of a famous model doing that, thanks.” 

“I was aware they could hear me.” Saffron said somewhat patronizingly. “The closest was within five feet of us, and there were twelve other individuals within usual hearing parameters when listening to a stranger speak in a room with multiple conversations. I just didn’t care.” Then, accusingly, “You all say I shouldn’t care how people feel about things I say, because I’m different but that’s not a bad thing.”

“It’s _not_.” They said quickly, lowering their voice as much as they could. “It’s just that people at these things can be kinda snobby about who gets in and Rich’s influence or not, they could probably stop us getting into some in future.”

“Ah.” She said, obligingly glancing around before continuing, voice lowered just enough for nobody else to hear, Bayley assumed. “I understand. A temporary ruse in order to facilitate re-infiltration.” 

Despite everything horrible that so many conversations with Saffron implied, that sentence included, Bayley found themself smiling. 

“That’s right.” 

“Excellent. Oh, look at that one! I like the layers.” 

“Very nice.” 

Saffron hummed as the model finished her strut before asking,

“Do _you_ know how to walk in heels?”

Bayley’s shoulders tensed. 

“What? Why would you ask that?” 

“Because you’re usually stylish, so I assumed you’d worn them before.” Saffron answered carefully, watching them. 

Maybe they’d spoken sharper than they wanted, but it didn’t quite warrant that level of evaluation. The words, though, had them shifting in place and blushing a little. 

“Oh.” They coughed. “Thanks. High praise coming from you.” When Saffron just stared they clarified, “You’re really stylish all the time as well. And pretty.” They added, since it always made Saffron smile, just a little. “Actually,” They frowned, “I’m kinda surprised you never wore heels before.”

“No, no.” She laughed, one of her short, brittle ones. They’d never heard her laugh for real. “My mom, she was a honeypot master but that wasn’t meant for me. She wanted me...cute, noticeable if needed but just as unnoticeable when that was required. Unremarkable. Forgettable. Small.” 

“Small?” Bayley frowned. “Surely she couldn’t make sure you were _small_.” 

“She could.” Saffron said simply, and then, “If you can’t teach me to walk in heels, I wonder who else might be classy enough for it?” 

There was a brief pause before both of them locked eyes and said in unison, 

“Laquisha.” 

Their giggling got a few annoyed side-glances, but it didn’t matter, not really, not when Saffron was actually smiling, actually _laughing_ , and looking positively giddy at the prospect of future fashion shows and high-heel lessons. 


	5. Rich 2 and Cat

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> tfw a load of them got brutally attacked and nobody knows whats going on or who did it
> 
> Lot of names in this one, so if it isn't obvious:  
> Heron = Saffron  
> Mink = Bayley  
> Beetle = Cain  
> Nine-Tails = Vix

**T Minus 635 Days**

“Don’t ever do that again!” Cat yelled with all the terrified fury of a mother. “What the _hell_ did you think you were doing?!” 

“He- He-” Heron stuttered, before blurting something in a language that sounded vaguely arabic and then breaking down into heaving sobs. Rich watched as Cat’s face rapidly cycled through expressions before going blank and wished he’d stayed in the suit so he could have had that sentence translated. It didn’t seem long enough that the developing pidgin among them could have affected it. 

“Did you have to ask that _now_?” One of the doctors glared. 

“Sorry.” Cat blinked, then again, before turning her focus on them. “I came to give you her medical information and, uh. Got angry. Once I let the others know about Butterfly’s missing spleen I came right here just in case Heron wasn’t coherent enough.” 

“Well she sure as hell isn’t now.” The same one grumbled. “Go ahead.”

“Right.” Cat said. “Only, see, Shark’s file on her is five pages long-” She snapped her hands up at the fierce looks some of them gave her. “Hey, that’s from _before_ she started working with me.” 

“Dun worry, they’re all dead now.” Heron slurred. 

“How many times do I have to tell you _doesn’t_ make people feel better?” Cat sighed. 

One of them shook off their stupor and went back to their frantic motions. 

“Just call out if anything seems to be important.” 

“Well, for a start, if that’s a general anaesthetic you’re prepping there I’d ask you to not use it. It doesn’t properly work and first and last time we tried that she nearly killed three of us before realising where she was.” 

The man who’d been prepping the IVs froze. 

“I _said sorry_.” Came the whine from Heron. 

“I know. Not your fault.” Cat said wryly, glancing down at her phone again. “Not taken any injuries to the wings before, but there’s some damage to her left shoulder so be wary of that. Multiple dislocations, apparently. Ah, seems Lidocaine’s a wash, sorry, but bupivacaine should work alright. Apart from that there’s not much that’s too important- oh, except that she won’t react if something hurts. Heron, remember to tell them if your pain suddenly spikes, okay?”

“‘S stupid.” She grumbled, but vaguely waved a hand that was gently pushed back down in a move Cat seemed to take as agreement. 

“Right. Great.” Cat said. Her gaze had fixed on a scalpel and was staying there. “We’ll get out of your way then. I’ll be right outside. Alright?” 

Heron wasn’t the only one to give a distracted agreeing mumble, and Rich smirked a little even as she hauled him out of the room and partway down the corridor. 

“Okay. Alright. Fuck.” Cat was saying, phone still tightly clutched in one hand as her other raked across her scalp. It was rare to see her without the hood up but the staff were still trying their best not to stare; the same could not be said for the civilians in the waiting area. “You know what? I’m going to have a nap.” She shoved the phone into his chest and then heavily sat in one of the plastic chairs. For a moment she buried her face in her hands and took a few deep breaths before she settled back, arms crossed, head back, eyes closed. “Wake me if anything happens.” She said, and went quiet.

“...Cat?” He ventured after a few moments, but she stayed still and quiet. 

“What the fuck.” Said someone else in the waiting room, but when he looked up everyone was avoiding his eyes. With a sigh he glanced down at the phone in his grasp and then carefully sat in a seat one away from Cat and settled in for a wait. 

He really shouldn’t have been surprised when, within an hour, other injured Champions started drifting in, waving off fluttering personnel and occasionally bringing news of their own. 

Shark was first, despite her rigour with enforcing rest in the others usually, arguing quietly with a doctor about the relative non-severity of her wounds and sitting mulishly between Cat and him, quietly telling him that Mink and Butterfly’s surgery had gone alright. Spots followed soon after, similarly relatively uninjured. Nine-Tails was the next to shuffle in, moving with the characteristic slowness and glassy eyes of someone on the good stuff and settling very carefully into a chair. She seemed generally washed out and was breathing carefully but started to bounce back to her usual cheerful self as the champions chatted amongst themselves. 

Beetle, though uninjured during the fight, came storming in searching for Nine-Tails and was immediately met by a chorus of ‘sssh!’. He settled for sitting next to her and hissing at her, and shot a glare at Slink-Mink when they came through the doors. Mink glared right back, and it lasted for about five seconds before they went pale, swayed on their feet, and were rapidly pulled down onto a chair and had their head shoved between their knees as Beetle lectured them about the importance of _resting_ after blood loss and Butterfly was fast asleep, why couldn’t they all be like her? 

When the door opened Cat snapped awake without any other stimuli which was rather suspicious, but Rich had rather more to be worried about considering the instant clamoring when the doctor informed them that Heron was safe and awake, though sleepy. 

“You need to let us see her!” 

“How’s her shoulder doing?” 

“Is she in lots of pain?” 

“Let us by!” 

“ _Guys_.” Cat said as she stood, and they all immediately went silent. Whatever she said next was in the developing champion pidgin and had more than one of them gaping at her before she turned to the doctor. “We’re going in there. We won’t keep her awake. Rich, give us five minutes.”

And, like most things with Cat, that was that.

* * *

“Are you alright?” Bayley immediately demanded as they all pushed into the room. 

“M’fine.” Saffron smiled. “You did good.”

“Is it true?” Vix immediately blurted after a brief glance to make sure they were alone. “What Cat said about the man on the roof, is it true?”

“...Yeah.” She said, giving them a brief, sad smile. Immediately, she was mobbed. 

“Shark, stop elbowing me.” Vix whined within a second. “It’s jostling my ribs.”

“Shut up Tails, I’m being stabbed by one of Beetle’s hidden knives.”

“Bite me.” 

“You really said that to _her_ , man?” Bayley snorted. 

“None of you would have this problem if you didn’t jump on my tiny hospital bed.” Saffron grumbled, much more awake than she was a moment before.

“Guys, arrange yourselves better.” Cat scolded as she slid through the chaos and wrapped her arms securely about Saffron from behind. 

“Fuck off, mom.” Several of them chorused. 

“Oh my god, what did I do to deserve this?” She muttered, squeezing tighter when she heard Saffron let out a breathless chuckle. 

“If the bed breaks, I’m blaming you all.” Saffron said as they all more or less settled into the cuddle pile. 

“If it breaks, Richie is paying for it.” Cat returned with a shrug, watching as the injured bird suppressed a yawn. “If you’re tired, go to sleep. The rest will be good for you.”

“Okay.” She agreed easily, which was a sign of just how exhausted she was. “Night guys. Night Chameo.” She addressed the vent. 

“Goodnight.” The reply echoed ominously from it. 


	6. Cat 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> tfw when youve been dealing with a brainwashed undying cult assassin for nearly two weeks and part of that was watching his ex-cult twin sister explain the concept of library cards because he was a lover of 18th century poetry and its really hard to be scared of him after that

**T Minus 655 Days**

Cat swore her heart stopped in her chest for a moment when she saw Saffron slumped bonelessly against the bars, J tucked into the opposite corner with blood dripping from his hands. Then she saw Saffron’s chest rising and falling steadily, and her panicked stare shifted to a mild glare before she looked at J. The blood was from where his nails were digging into his palms. 

“She’s not supposed to be in here alone with you.” She stated, jerking her head at the sleeping woman like there was any doubt who she was talking about. 

“I figured.” He said distantly. 

“You okay?” She asked cautiously. 

“Fine.” 

Alright. She figured she didn’t really want to know what conversation she’d missed. And keeping quiet and present was usually a good way to get people like J talking instead of talking at that. So she leant against the worktable, and waited. It took five minutes, but he did quietly speak. 

“I don’t understand why she keeps coming here.” 

Cat, who’d learnt a lot about loyalty over the last few months, didn’t say anything. The Court had made loyalty a core part of its teachings, ensuring that those born into it could never escape. But that had also been their first mistake- when you trained people to be intensely loyal, you couldn’t exactly train who they would be loyal _to_. The second had been breaking their own rules about siblings; the third had been their obsession with bloodlines, for all it revealed and implied about the twins’ connection. 

The Court had made them loyal to their bones, and they’d been loyal to each other above all else. 

“She used to look happy to see me, but I ruined it.” He continued, still in that distant tone of voice. He was almost definitely having a breakdown or episode of some sort. 

“She did?” She asked regardless, unable to help herself. 

“Yeah. When I took her on missions I let her act and dress how she wanted. But then I stopped taking her. She was upset with me.” He pitched forward slightly, towards her sleeping form. The cell wasn’t particularly big- he wouldn’t have to move much more to put her in his reach. “She always wanted to be graceful. Pretty. The Court didn’t allow it, not as much as she wanted, not even with so much of mother’s favour.” 

“And what did you want, J?”

That finally snapped him back into the present, though she wasn’t actually sure that was for the best considering the way he laughed, low and mocking, as he raised his head and stared at her. 

“I wanted to be safe. Learnt pretty quick that was a farce though.” He shifted his weight but kept his eyes locked on hers. “Nowhere is safe. Especially not from _them_.” 

“You know it’s not okay the way they treated you. You know that, don’t you?” 

Something in his expression broke for a split second before he rolled his eyes and sat back again. 

“I’m well aware that it’s not the way most people raise their children. But some things are necessary, you know?” He smiled bitterly. “For the cause. And you know, you must know, that father was a bully. Even amongst the Court he threw me around far more than he should have, all in the name of toughening me up.” He leant forward, still smiling. “But Saffron had it far worse. Mother barely laid a hand on her but trust me when I say that out of the two parents? She was the dangerous one. Sure, she was soft on Saffron, but that didn’t change the fact that she was ruthless.” 

“If you’re trying to downplay what you suffered, that’s not really going to work on me.” 

“I didn’t suffer-” 

“You _suffered_.” Her tone brooked no argument. “And Saffron certainly isn’t going around wailing about how much better you had it and how unfair it was, so get that nonsense out of your head.” 

“Why the hell should you care?” He snarled. “If you care because of her then you’re wasting your time. I was a terrible brother- she shouldn’t care and neither should you.”

“That’s a sad way of looking at it.” She eased herself onto the floor. “Do you want to know something? The first time she mentioned you- mentioned she had a brother- we’d never seen her so quiet. She was arguing that she did understand jokes, said ‘my brother’, and went so still and silent. Then she said that you told jokes all the time.” 

He was staring, so she continued. 

“The next time she really mentioned you was when she was getting annoyed at us for worrying about her. She told us that she wasn’t used to people being worried about her, or at least not showing it like us, hovering and helping and insisting that wounds be treated. So when we asked, she said that her mom would make sure she wouldn’t be worried about whatever it was again, and that her brother would get angry at someone and shout, and that her brother’s girlfriend would give her side-glances and smuggle her sweets. She never mentioned you by name until you actually showed up, and she spoke about you a fair few times.” 

“Why are you telling me this?” He demanded, though the way his voice shook slightly was very telling. 

“Because a week ago you shot her and she stabbed you and you stabbed someone she cares about a lot and it was all very serious.” She leant forward, uncaring of the danger it might put her in, to stare him dead in the eyes. “But despite all the ways we’ve helped her, she’s never been happier than we’ve seen her this week. Because you’re alive, J. You’re alive, and you’re here. And you. You’ve gotten angry, and you’ve yelled, and it ain’t that scary for us or for her. Because you’re worried, aren’t you?” She smiled. 

“Fuck you.” He said, seemingly on automatic, and seemed stunned when she laughed, leaning back on her hands casually. 

“Yeah, you’re not that scary when I know you’re just playing the protective big brother role.” She snorted. “Which she isn’t too thrilled about. She never shuts up about how you’re only five minutes older.” 

He shifted a little, reaching a hand out to hesitantly brush at Saffron’s hair and pulling back as if burnt. 

“Of course that’s what she’s annoyed about.” He said quietly. “Not that it’s too little, too late. And she wonders why people worry, when she’s such a dumbass.” 

“I think,” Cat started slowly, “That for people like you, in the kind of situation you were in, there’s not really such a thing as too little too late. Not in Saffron’s opinion, anyway. Although, I wouldn’t recommend going for Mink again.” She added. 

“Noted.” He said a little darkly. 

“Obviously both of us would prefer you not go for _anyone_ when you come out with us, but Mink is a particular no-go.” 

“Yes, I-” He paused. “When I what?” 

“You’re not going to trust us with her.” She shrugged. “So if she’s going out on patrol, you’re going with her. Seems the easiest way to resolve this.” 

“You can’t be serious. I’m dangerous.” He said flatly. “You’re really going to trust me with your life?” 

“Yes. And more importantly, the lives of my beasties and Saff’s happiness. So don’t let me down, yeah?” She smiled as she stood again and started casually brushing the dust off of herself. “It’ll be a couple weeks yet til we even consider letting her out again, especially since she's still on heparin, and she won’t really be able to use her wings for a couple of months so you have some time to get used to the idea.”

“Cat, wait!” He called after her as she headed for the stairs. She paused and glanced over her shoulder to see him gritting his teeth, a sharp contrast to the way he was shakily running his fingers through Saffron’s hair and avoiding her gaze by looking at the floor. “...Thanks. For...believing in me.” 

“Don’t let me down.” She repeated after a moment with a shrug before leaving, making sure to close the door quietly. Saffron was still asleep, after all. 


	7. Bayley 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> tfw your friend nearly died in a bank collapse (after an attempted heist you foiled) because his phobia prevented them grabbing someones hand and saffron has been weird the entire time

**T Minus 532 Days**

“What’re you working on?” Bayley asked, legs idly kicking back and forth. 

“Medication dispenser linked to bioreader for Sam.” Came the absent response as she focused on welding some small part. 

It had always been fascinating, really. Watching her work at something so delicate, so gentle, while the hems of her skirt were still soaked in blood from an earlier skirmish, red seeping through the floorboards and spattering across the wood in a steady drip, drip, drip (at least until Catarina lost her patience and had the workshop floor replaced with something easily mopped, with metal that just reflected the dark of the blood back more starkly).

And always, in the back of their mind, they wondered. The group had access to official threat classifications of all of them, courtesy of their more support-based Champions, as well as those put together for fun by the public. Heron was always deceptively low on them, deceptively weak, _harmless_. Even when Bayley knows first hand that she’s anything but. It’s startling, really, the layers of misunderstanding; even amongst Champions she’s a lurking beast, a terrible, terrible _animal_ that’s taken as many lives on the streets as some of the other killers amongst them, the heavy-hitters, but everyone else just sees her as backup, as the mechanic. The one with the pretty costume, practically nameless. Skulls and ribs break under the soles of her heavy boots and still, people underestimate the danger she poses.

How does she do that? How does she _do that_?

When did the sound of bones breaking become familiar to Bayley? When had it become familiar to _Saffron_? And why The Pretty Bird. The Heron. Was it just that simple, or did she want something like to be liked? To be underestimated? 

“Medication dispenser?” 

“To counteract the panic response to touch. Idiot nearly died in the collapse cos of his phobia.” 

“You’re worried about them.” Bayley blinked. 

“I worry about everyone.” She said simply. “But yes, right now in particular I’m worried about him, especially since they refused to talk to a psychiatrist. I asked Doc L about medication and dosages. I’ll get her and Allen to check my programming to make sure it’s safe.” 

“Hmm, sorry.” Bayley muttered. “Sometimes I still can’t read you too well.” 

“I know.” Saffron smile slightly, but it was a little off. “Not your fault.” Then she stopped, and squinted up at them. “There’s something you want to ask. You’ve been fidgeting more than usual.” 

“Uh, I guess.” They fidgeted slightly. “You were acting sort of weird in the bank, is all. I was wondering how you’re doing?” 

“Ah, the bank. Well, the sudden robbery was quite surprising. And you were very impressive, sliding through the vents like that. It was a little distracting and I wasn’t always sure where you were, which is impressive as well.” 

“Aw, thanks- wait.” The smile dropped off their face to be replaced with a frown. “Stop trying to distract me! What did Doc L say, you have to actually talk about these things if you can manage it!” 

“Fine.” She bit out, pushing her goggles up into her hair as she put the mini torch to the side and turned her chair towards them. 

“You don’t _have_ to.”

“No, it’s fine. It’s just...sometimes, it feels like I’m two people.” She said quietly, turning the circuit board over and over in her hand, eyes fixed on it. “There’s the me that is getting better, that doesn’t feel so weighed down, that is...more me, probably, than I’ve ever managed to be. But there is also a version of me that is never going to let go, that feels like I’m still there. In the Court.” 

The circuit board suddenly snapped with a quiet crack as Saffron’s fingers spasmed, and she blinked slowly at it. Bayley watched in alarm as one tear, then two, streaked down her face. 

“I’m...familiar, I guess, with the way that regret clings to you. I have to believe that Sam can get better because if he can’t then there’s no hope for me.” 

“I thought you _were_ feeling better.” Bayley said in a very small voice. 

“I was. I _am_. But I think this is always gonna be a part of me somehow. It’s like- have you ever lost somebody? And the years pass and the grief fades but it’s still a part of you, forever. Like a scar that’s healed, you know?” Bayley nodded even though she still hadn’t looked up. “It’s like that. I think in some way I’m grieving, but I don’t know who for. For me? For Jay? For everyone in the Court with no other option, for everyone that I- the things that were done to me, the things that I did, they’re never going to go away, Bayley.” 

“I know that.”

“I don’t really think you do.” Saffron said, but it wasn’t recriminating. Just a mild rebuffal. “And you have helped me, you’ve me all helped me, but sometimes I really hate how great you all are. Because I don’t feel like I deserve it. And the better I feel around you, the more I also feel like that when things get bad.” 

Bayley slid off of the desk and padded over to her, gently brushing the tears away before putting their head on her shoulder. The lack of reaction from Saffron didn’t really hurt. 

“You’re not a monster, Saff.” 

“That’s a matter of opinion.” She said, but she didn’t say anything else and neither did Bayley. They stayed in that position in silence until Cain called them upstairs for dinner.


	8. Rich 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> tfw you find out they were involved in a prison riot AKA Rich: I’m gonna fund and support these guys fighting the little fights we cant do :)  
> Rich every 6 months: what. The fuck. Is this what being a dad feels like am I going grey I feel like I should be going grey. How do they keep getting into such trouble.

**T Minus 466 Days**

The news that Heron had been involved in another fight undercover wasn’t that much of a surprise. If she wasn’t a godly magical girl he’d have said her superpower was being underestimated, even more so than Akiko, which made her perfect for undercover roles. 

No, the confusing part was that he’d realised the undercover work had been in a prison. Specifically, the prison that had been on the news for a deadly riot. 

“Cat.” He said, past the hand covering his face. “Did your champions start a prison riot?” 

“Technically,” She slowly drew the word out, “They just accidentally accelerated a riot that was already going to happen.” 

“Extracting Jay and Beetle after such a public riot was a nightmare, especially with the state Jay was in.” Allen grumbled. “Heron and Rattler were easy though, resignations after riots are pretty common. Swings and roundabouts.” 

“Swings and roundabouts.” Rich repeated flatly, dropping his hand to stare at him. “You people are seriously messed up sometimes.”

“We-ell, we’re a technically unsanctioned paramilitary organisation made up of misfits that dress up like circus performers, sometimes jump off skyscrapers for fun and occasionally get possessed by gods, so this isn’t really the place for healthy coping mechanisms.” She said. “If you don’t laugh you’ll- well. The end of that sentence varies.”

“Cry.” Allen suggested. “Panic. Dissociate in a dark corner. Try to strangle the next person you see. Go-” 

“Got it, thanks Allen!” Rich quickly him off. 

“The riot was already planned- or a mostly fake riot, anyway- by the criminal elements we were investigating.” Cat sighed. “The actions that were taken in order to save our champions unfortunately kickstarted a real riot in place of the fake one. Does that suffice?” 

“Gotta be honest Cat, not really.”

“We have our reports as well as some witness accounts.” She said. “Would it make you feel better to have that?” 

He paused. That was showing a lot of trust in him that he hadn’t thought he’d earned yet. But it would make him feel much better. 

“Thanks.” He said. 

Richard sat back after hours of reading and scrubbed at his face. There was a lot to work through there. 

First off, Jay and Heron were siblings from a pretty nasty family, by the sounds of things. That answered a lot of questions and opened up more but for once he wasn’t sure he wanted to go looking. For a start they’d already shown a lot of trust by letting him know that. 

He also wasn’t sure he could stomach what he found. 

For God’s sake, Heron had been- and he’d triple checked this but the reports all corroborated it- drugged, knocked around, tased twice and stabbed in the thigh and had continued to fight for at least another hour. That was almost superhuman, and he didn’t want to think about what she’d been through to facilitate that kind of resistance. Nor what kind of people casually swallowed bagged mini weapons for throwing up later.

The stuff about Jay’s murderous rampage was also worrying, and he was sure to have accounted for a lot of the death toll. But Heron, it seemed, had been placed deliberately to counteract that. A situation where she was the stable one supporting someone else. 

What the hell was he supposed to do to help them? 

“Hey.” He said as he stumbled back into the main common room. Some of them gave him mildly alarmed looks. “How’s Heron doing?” 

“Mink’s basically sitting on her to make sure she heals up properly.” Spinnerette offered after a moment. “Basically how it always goes when she gets injured.”

“Alright.” He relaxed a little. “What about Jay?” 

“Dude’s a nightmare.” Shark snorted. “But he’s doing alright. Beetle’s keeping an eye on him.”

“Okay. Sure. Someone keep me updated- and _don’t_ pull something like this again.” 

“That’s not up to us, actually.” Someone called after him as he left, but he wasn’t paying much attention. Instead he was researching psychiatrists with experience with vigilantes and heroes. He was sure the UDL had some employed. 


	9. Rich 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> tfw they underwent a terrible psychic attack dredging up all their past pain and after everything seems to be over organised crime rocks up to take them out and gets suddenly blown up along with the warehouse the psychic creatures had been in

**T Minus 302 Days**

The figure, no longer backlit by an explosion, turned out to be a woman. A rather tall woman who looked like she’d stepped from the pages of a comic-book. She was wearing a skirt, a corset and an attached shoulder pad covered in spikes. She had a collar with spikes. She had sharp needles pushed through her ponytail. And she somehow didn’t look ridiculous, which was rather unfair in Rich’s opinion. 

“Zee!” Heron shrieked, throwing herself at the woman who quickly twisted so the champion hit her somewhere with no spikes. Jay was openly gaping and it was one of the only times Rich had ever seen him keep his eyes on a single spot for more than five seconds. 

Cat seemed more perturbed than confused or surprised. 

“The infamous Zizi, I presume.” She said dryly. “Serious question, do _any_ of you people stay dead?” 

Zizi, apparently, shot her a sharp look before frowning down at the girl holding onto her and finally glancing at Jay somewhat awkwardly. Her gloved hands were hovering uncertainly in the air. 

“Don’t tell me you don’t recognise her after spending so long feeding her sweet tooth.” He said, voice flat from remnants of shock. 

There was a flash of realisation on her face before she glanced down at Heron again, putting a hand lightly on the top of her head. 

“ _Mon rouge_ , why the fuck is your hair white?” She asked, voice surprisingly husky. 

“Ah!” Heron finally pulled back. “I think it was stress and maybe a bad chemical reaction to whatever mom had me drink before my escape.” 

There were two immediate responses to that. 

“Sure, of course, I don’t know why I was expecting a normal answer like hair dye.” Zizi sighed. 

“Why would you consume anything she gave you?!” Jay yelled. 

“Okay, just because she poisoned you once-” 

“No, she actively tried to poison me four times and you once! How did _you_ forget that and _I_ remember?”

“Enough.” Zizi cut sharply across their bickering, giving everyone watching the stink-eye. “Can I speak to you both for a moment.” 

Jay’s body language shifted subtly as Heron’s eyes narrowed slightly but both of them obligingly followed her out of immediate earshot, though they were all still visible. 

Rich leant closer to Cat, who like everyone else was watching very closely. 

“So this seems awkward.” He muttered. A moment later Jay and Zizi visibly broke into an argument, Heron turning her head back and forth between them like she was watching a tennis match and looking just as entranced. 

“I feel like assumed dead exes suddenly reappearing _should_ be awkward.” She muttered back. 

“Are you _serious_? Why are your lives so crazy?” Clive asked from behind them, though she notably didn’t jump like Rich did. 

“You know, it’s bad hearing that from one of you.” She said. 

The arguing had gotten loud enough that some snatches of french could be made out, though not enough to actually distinguish their conversation topic. Heron was frowning at whatever was being said as Zizi gestured between her and watching group of heroes. 

“Ah.” Beetle said dryly. “I think I guessed the issue.” 

“Yeah.” Cat sighed. 

Heron was starting to verbally push back by the looks of things when Jay said something that had both women swinging glares at him. Then Zizi punched him square in the face with a crack that carried all the way to the gaping watchers, followed by Heron’s long, low whistle. 

More than one UDL member swore and made to move forward only to have a Champion or their limb suddenly blocking the path. 

“It’s fine.” Cat said with a tired tut, own arm out to halt Rich. “He probably deserved that. If he didn’t Heron would have stopped it.” She paused and tilted her head. “Or Jay. Damn, he must have _really_ deserved it.” 

Indeed, the man was sullenly prodding at where he’d been hit but making no move to retaliate. Even from so far away it was easy to see Zizi take a deep breath and forcefully release some the tension in her frame before turning her attention to Heron, who tilted her head at her pretty cockily as she spoke. Zizi scoffed and ruffled her hair, pulling her bag open and handing Heron a small paper bag that had her perking up as she peered into it. 

Jay rolled his eyes and Zizi shot him another glare, but before anything else could happen Heron- bag tucked away somewhere in the split second of distraction- stepped between them with a visible snarl. Zizi jolted a little at a savage point at her alongside something said rather angrily before Heron’s attention swung to Jay, who gave her an utterly betrayed look for whatever she said. 

“Uh-oh.” Croc said to the side, and they glanced over to see Mink storming their way to the threesome. 

“Uh-oh.” Cat echoed. “Might not avoid bloodshed after all.” 

“ _Hé_!” They snapped over whatever Zizi was staying before rather ferociously laying into her and then Jay the moment attention was turned to them. Heron was standing slightly apart from the spectacle, pushed out by Mink’s sheer presence, watching with a mildly impressed expression. 

Zizi seemed completely bewildered at first but slowly started to get irritated, cutting Mink off with something that earned her a rather vicious snap that had multiple Champions whistling or exclaiming. They literally snapped their jaws at the beginning as well. 

Zizi seemed to scornfully wave it off before reaching out to Mink. Her wrist was immediately caught by both Jay and Heron; it was downright alarming how fast that girl could cover ground sometimes. 

“Alright, enough!” Cat called over before things could deteriorate further. “Get over here. Sai too.” 

Zizi glowered at Heron and Jay as she wrenched herself free, but a moment later her face smoothed over as she followed the champions back. 

“Now I can’t read lips in french as well as Mink here,” Cat started slowly, clearly relishing in the brief look of surprise on her face, “But I think it rather unfair to disparage Heron’s choice in working with us and blaming Jay for, ahem, ‘letting her’ do that, when you’re aware of the _rigidity_ of their childhood.”

Zizi’s eyes widened briefly before she gritted her teeth and glanced away. 

“You’re right. It was...unfair. But I was a little put off by seeing two people I thought dead on tv because they were getting involved in the affairs of the beastial gods.” 

“Hey, we thought you were dead first!” Heron protested. 

Cat’s comment at the beginning was starting to make a lot more sense. But more importantly...

“You know about them?” Rich asked. 

“Yes.” She said flatly, looking at him. 

“Not a fan?” Clive noticed. 

“Not particularly endeared to spineless gods who do nothing, no.” 

“Hmm. Not entirely sure you can call any god who made _her_ their champion a coward.” Cat mused, jerking her thumb at Heron, who smiled uncertainly at all the eyes on her with a few too many teeth. “But I’m not really interested in arguing with you about this.” 

“Because you know you’ll lose?” Zizi snorted. 

“No, because I don’t care.” Cat said calmly. “And you do, but that’s not actually what this is about, is it?” 

“It’s not?” Heron asked. “Is it about Jay?”

“No, it’s not about _Jay_. I’m worried about you!” She exclaimed. 

Something indescribable flickered across Heron’s face as she frowned. 

“You never used to yell when you were worried about me.” 

Rich watched in interest as something inside of Zizi seemed to crumble to pieces, posture loosening slightly as her facial expression cracked for a moment. 

“No.” She agreed quietly. “But perhaps I should have.” 

Cat glanced between them before sighing and clapping her hands. 

“Alright, everyone’s exhausted and mentally fucked. Let’s get home, have some rest, then maybe you can continue this reunion when everyone’s in better spirits.” 

There was a quiet round of agreements. 

“Come on, we’ll take you.” Rich sighed. 

“Oh thank _god_.” Someone said. 


	10. Allen 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> tfw you avoided a divine apocalypse by the skin of your teeth a few months ago

**T Plus 72 Days**

“Can you make me a deep and detailed legal identity?” 

Allen startled and shot a glare at Saffron for appearing in front of him so suddenly while he was working on some notes.

“Since when have you wanted to be anything other than a non-legal entity?” He asked. 

“Non-legal entities can’t buy property or foster children.” 

He dropped his pen on the floor with a loud clatter as he gaped up at her. Anyone in the common room who hadn’t been paying attention were after that. 

“Looking after children is a serious commitment.” Cat frowned, leaning forward in her seat as she laid her leg over her other knee and leant on it. “You certainly wouldn’t be able to leave them alone while you patrol, and there’s other things to think about. Like an official income.” 

“I wasn’t going to leave them alone.” She blinked slowly. “You’re always telling me to work less.” 

“Not sure if looking after young children is _quite_ the relaxing time off I had in mind.” Cat said dryly. 

“She didn’t specify young children.” Bayley’s voice drifted down from the ceiling, followed by the person themself. “Anyway, Al, she doesn’t have a birth certificate or anything- Akiko was freaking out about it. You can handle an identity that deep, right?” 

“Yes.” He said, giving them a brief glare before glancing down at his notepad, where he’d started scribbling down the information he’d need and the places he’d need to crack. “But you’re gonna have to work with me on the details, Saff.” 

“Sure. It’ll be my life.” She shrugged. 

“Great.” He smirked. “So do you actually have a surname?” 

She blinked at him again before pointing at Bayley, who watched indulgently. 

“Can’t I just use Bayley’s?” 

He ignored Cat choking on her coffee to raise an eyebrow at Saffron.

“That’s not a particularly romantic way to propose.” 

“Bayley doesn’t want that.” She said with a frown, but Bayley was smiling. 

“Yeah, I don’t.” They shrugged. “It’s not like we’re dating. Why would we do romantic things?” 

“Sure.” He sighed, because he was familiar enough with the sentiment even if he’d never been interested in tying himself to anyone, ever. There were a lot of confused-looking allos in the room liable to put their feet in their mouths, however. “I’m still going to need a surname for you _before_ you get married, though.” 

“Misery.” She said. 

“Wow. _Little_ on the nose.” Bayley countered. “Maybe something a little less obvious?” 

“Fer.” She said, with a French inflection. 

“That just means iron, doesn’t it?” 

“Yeah.” 

Bayley sighed and looked at him, but there was no way in hell he was shooting down another of Saffron’s ideas. He wasn’t suicidal. 

“Saffron Fer it is.” He said. Saffron smiled at him; Bayley looked intimately betrayed. “Don’t look at me like that, I literally only need it for a previous name thing on documents. You do realise I’m not an amateur, we’ll need to break into city hall to put physical backdated copies aaaand I just remembered who I’m talking to. Yeah, it’s fine. By the way Saff, when’s your birthday?”

“Uh.” 

“Good question, when _is_ your birthday? I’ve been asking for years!” That was Cat. 

“It’s the same as J’s.” Bayley sniggered. 

“ _He won’t tell me either_.” 

Saffron sighed, very heavily, and said, 

“It’s October 31st.” 

“You were born on _Halloween_?” 

“You were born on _Samhain_?” 

“And this is why I didn’t say.” Saffron crossed her arms. “Are we done here?” 

“Yeah, for now, go hide yourself away.” He waved her off as he pulled his laptop over and woke it up. 

She tried to scuttle off but quickly got swamped by a number of other champions determined to plan her next birthday party. Bayley was no help, laughing off to the side. 

Cat took the opportunity to sidle over to his side. 

“I have no idea what just happened.” She told him in an undertone.

“Just because I’m aplatonic doesn’t mean all aros are.” He said distractedly, already typing on his laptop. “Get back to me once you’ve looked up queerplatonic relationships, I’ve got identities to work on.” 

“Sir yes sir.” She saluted playfully before glancing over at the knot of people. “Well, the details don’t really matter.” 

“They’re both properly happy.” He agreed quietly. 


End file.
